The walker limits what I can do.

Joan has lived in her apartment in Gramercy for more than 50 years. “I’m very happy here,” she says. “I love the neighborhood, it’s near everything.” 

When she first moved in, her father helped build the shelves in the living room, which still hold the many books and trinkets she’s collected over the past few decades. He also hung her potted plants by the window. All these years later and they’re as sturdy as ever. “He was a man who could fix anything,” says Joan. 

The walls are full of framed photos — many of which Joan took herself. She was first introduced to the artform as a college student at Fordham. When choosing her classes, Joan had to pick an elective. On a whim, she chose photography. “I didn’t graduate,” she says, “but I became a photographer.”

For years, Joan made a living taking photos. Her work has been featured in books, shown in galleries and even used on greeting cards. One of her most popular photos came from a series Joan took of her late mother. In it, Joan’s mother has curlers in her hair, cucumbers over her eyes and a face mask smeared on her skin. “She was my best model,” says Joan. “She enjoyed it.”

Mostly, Joan took photos of things happening around the city — parades, demonstrations, current events — and sold them to news outlets and other publications.  

“I was really very into it,” she says. “Now, I can’t do a thing. I really miss it.”

At 94 years old, Joan now struggles to hold a camera. “My hands won’t work,” she says. The whole process — finding the light, adjusting the settings, holding the camera steady, even just downloading the photos to her computer — has become too much. “I don’t remember the steps.” Even if she could, she can’t leave her apartment without help. 

It all started when Joan fell. “I went out into the hall and just slid down to the floor. I got up and I couldn’t move,” she says. “The next morning, I was literally in so much pain, I called 911.” 

Joan had broken one of the vertebrae in her spine. She had to have surgery to repair it. That was three years ago. She’s still in physical therapy, but her mobility hasn’t improved much. “I have a balance problem,” she says. She uses a rolling walker, though she finds it frustrating. “When I go out on the street with the walker, I don’t go alone anymore because, when I reach the curb on the other side, I can’t lift the walker up onto the sidewalk,” she says. “It limits what I can do.”

It especially limits her in the kitchen. “I have a whole box of recipe cards. I used to enjoy cooking,” says Joan. Now, it’s too painful to stand for as long as it would take to prepare a meal. “Thankfully, I have the meals on wheels.” 

Joan has been receiving home-delivered meals since her fall. During this past winter, she was especially appreciative of the emergency meals delivered during the colder months, which ensure she still has something to eat, even if storms interrupt her usual meal delivery. “They really help me a lot,” she says, “they really do.”